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2:24 p.m. - 06.30.04
Brand New Me, Same Shitty You
I have not been in a diary writing mood lately. Today is really no exception and I forgot my F-ing camera. Mr. Bossman is out of town or state or country or something the rest of the week. Whoop! So I�m bored because I�m not trying to pretend I�m working thus actually�working. I should have brought a book to read today because I�m going to end up standing outside most of the day wishing I had someone to talk to. Not everyone here is as lucky as me. And ooo boy let me tell you. I�m the luckiest duck this side of the flooding Trinity. Or something. My big project today is making a For Sale thingy for Jenni�s dad�s house.

Rain

So it seems the rain will not let up. It is supposed to rain all week. I love the rain, I love playing in the rain but I hate the muggy and I hate the traffic and I really especially hate the demonic mosquitoes that have been attacking me every time I walk outside. My legs are not your personal feeding ground. Bastards. I�ll kill you and your children.

Lunch Time

I think I�m going to go home on my lunch break and get my paycheck. Might as well go ahead and cash it that way it will be easier for me to spend all the money on my way home from work. I need to buy the wireless whatever it�s called for my home computer. I need to get speakers for said computer, and I want to go to the bookstore and buy myself a nice little book to add to the ever growing collection. Books are your friends. Television is the offspring of the devil. VH1 will suck out your soul. Good thing my soul died years ago in the flash flood of the Atacama Desert or I would be up shit creek without a paddle. How did I get on this topic? I�m in such a weird mood today.

Now Let Me Tell You WHY

Okay I don�t have a reason why. Maybe it�s all the dorkbots I work with. They aren�t dorks in the, hey he�s such a dork isn�t he fun, but in a dorky I have a blow up doll and I beat off while playing Mortal Kombat kinda way. �I think Kitana and Sonya Blade�s lips touched just a second ago�OH GOD!� By the way Bo Rai Cho STILL looks like Ron Jeremy.

no, No and NO!

I drove home for work yesterday minding my own business jamming out to Ewan and Nicole having a fumar when suddenly I�m being honked at. It�s not my driving because well I wasn�t doing any stuck on the freeway with no way to move. I figured it was for someone else but I looked to my left and this truck full of guys is waving at me. Reluctantly I turned down my music.

Driver: Hola

Me: Yeah�something wrong?

Driver: No. What�s going on?

Me: Nothing

Passenger Uno: Wanna go have a beer?

Me: Sure don�t (At which point I turned my music back up and rolled up the window

I don�t understand the logic behind trying to pick people up while driving. And why would you think that line would even remotely intrigue me? I�m not so much of a lush that I would go have beer with a bunch of illegal aliens crammed into a 20 year old truck. Try the girl in the blue ZX2. She�s a total slut.

Ban

What the hell is going on with some people today?? If stupidity was fatal (oh if it only really was fatal) more than half the people I work with would be dead.

Overheard

Work Neighbor�2 cubicles away: �What the fuck are you telling me? I didn�t fucking hang up on you. You stop talking I thought you were gone. I am NOT going to have this conversation with you when you�re acting like a fucking idiot.�

Some guy at McDonalds : �I thought about Ninja chopping him but then I decided to just hit him with my car.�

Scott: ��and then it was like �Surprise!! You�re fired!� They had to have backup. He�s no shrinking violet. More like shrieking violent.�

These two guys getting coffee:
Guy 1: You haven�t seen it yet? It came out like 5 months ago!
Guy 2: I hadn�t even heard of it until a few days ago. I live under a rock, okay?
Guy 1: Bitch, I live under like 4 rocks and I�D heard of it.

Stranger: �Dude, he broke his SPINE.�

Scott (again) : �You know that crazy squirrel from the movie Ice Age? He reminds me of my boyfriend.�

Overheard at Starbucks: �I don�t just want to know her in the biblical sense. I�d also like to know her in the Korannical, Torahesque, and maybe even the Necronomiconian sense.�

Ouch

Tex told me I had stupid shoes. I thought that was awfully mean considering he is wearing these hideous brown hick boots. I think my shoes are cute and Tex can go straight to hell.

You WHAT?

I work with the biggest bunch of needy overgrown children. They can do nothing without my help. All I can say is at least it keeps me in a job. I don�t mind doing stuff for people but they could at least be nice about it. I may be mean and make fun of people all the time but at least I have manners and I know when to say thank you.

HMMM

Should I get Paul a birthday present? His birthday is Friday. I really don�t know what to get him. I thought about getting him a New Order CD�Brotherhood to be exact but really just because of one song on the CD. I don�t know.

Speaking Of�

I am going through CD buying withdrawal. I do realize that I just bought a new CD last week. I need MORE. There are so many cool bands out there that I don�t know about yet.

Kimberly

Kimberly gave me a quiz to see if I was a psychopath. So here it is: A woman is at a funeral and she meets this man. After the funeral is over she keeps thinking about the man but she has no way of contacting him. So she kills her sister. Why did she kill her sister? Apparently they give this quiz to people applying for certain jobs. I'm a psychopath.

 

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